I Only Have Room To Believe

 

She broke me wide open,

but I have to get up.

She tore up everything thing I stood for.

Yeah, she roughed me up.


She looked me down

with her beady eyes,

her grey-soul mind,

said I'm made of lies.


Because I express differently,

she thinks she can misrepresent me,

and though I was in distress...

She twisted my request.

She made an awful mess.


My heart's been shattered glass.

Shards are everywhere,

and as I walk, they cut my soul,

and it's taken a heavy toll.


She abused her power to hurt me,

but I cannot let her beat me.

I cannot sink beneath the sand.

I'll speak my truth. I must demand

that people know

how the neuro-different fare

at the hands

of current ignorance

 - and sometimes 

malevolence.


It is indeed endemic,

though no one can see.

But am I to suffer

so they do see?


Can I be strong, entwined with this plight

to seek justice, to make this right

for the sake of the divergent song

for the chorus of the neuro-different, wronged?


We are everywhere,

and we have much to share.

But we are quite afflicted.

Sometimes we are addicted...


Am I strong enough

to banish these wine nights....

which only grossly weaken me

from rising with the right 

kind of fight?


Oh, I love so much.

It's this a sociopath can't stand,

and though I've been far from perfect,

I've made tools that I must work with.


I'll pray for clarity and strength

to come back from this darkened brink, 

to see past barriers that block the beacon

in spite of being weakened.


And though I am hurt and bereaved,

I need to pray and breathe

for the right kind of reprieve -

I only have room to believe.


2013


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